short snaps of life

hello~

2011-01-17T23:56:00.001+08:00

i'm back~ :)

Molten Chocolate Lava Cake!! in a Microwave!! for ONE!!

2010-05-30T20:39:00.000+08:00

it was another sleepless night and i was trawling food blogs (as usual) which made me amazingly hungry (as usual). when i found this recipe i was SO excited~!! i made the conversions, and rushed straight to the kitchen at nearly 3 in the morning to make it. heh. yeah, not good for the waistline, but i was having a baking craving and we all know how that turns out.

don't we?

when i made this recipe, i cooked it a bit too long, and it turned out to be chocolate cake! no photos, cause i was so excited i ate the whole thing in 5 minutes flat (while the log was sleeping). i'm going to do a few flavours tonight, in preparation for making it for my guardian angel, since this is her favourite cake :D

anyway! i'm making this post to record my conversions since the original recipe makes about 6 ramekins' worth.

side note: i found out my ramekins in Perth, along with a lot of other kitchen stuff was thrown away after a flood in a good friend's place. HEARTBROKEN! but i have to move on. and think about my future kitchen and the things i will fill it with!

Adapted from Fun and Food Blog (makes ONE)

one chocolate bar, chopped ( i think dark chocolate would work best, a bar is 43-45 g or 1/2 cup)

same amount of butter, softened a bit and chopped (but i would lessen it by a teaspoon, the trial run was too oily for me)

1 egg (mine is the normal smallish Asian egg :D)

1 teaspoon cocoa powder (i use Van Houten's that i found in the Macau supermarket, i think the flavour is quite good)

1/8 cup granulated sugar (or 2 Tablespoons, i would use less, just guesstimate it)

1/12 cup plain flour (omg really miniscule, 1.3 tablespoon, again, guesstimate, you're not going to serve this at a Michelin restaurant and if you are going to use this recipe, i would guess that you are not some gourmet food critic person :D)

1. Butter your mug. Use a brush or some paper napkin edge and er.."moisten it" with butter then rub the insides of the mug. Melt chopped chocolate in mug (i have a cheapass mug specially for these things, make sure it is microwave safe) on medium in the microwave for about 20 seconds (til it's soft enough to stir around). Add butter, and melt for another 10-15 seconds. Take out and stir. Careful! The mug may get HOT!

2. Beat eggs and sugar until it starts to whiten (according to orginal recipe. i was planning to put it in a small bottle and shake it! :D). Pour into chocolate mixture. Sift flour and cocoa powder together, then add to chocolate mixture. Stir gently to combine. COMBINE! not whip! hehe.

3. Now comes the fun bit! now i don't know what watt is my microwave, i searched high and low and all around it, but i didn't see anything. but what i did on the trial was to use the Medium setting, and microwaved for 2 minutes.

what i did wrong was

1. i covered it. so about 1 minute 10 seconds into the cooking process, i could see the cover start to rise above the mug! i'm a baking noob, i didn't know plain flour could rise that much! i stopped the microwave, took the plate off and let it continue to cook for another minute.

2. That last sentence was another mistake. I'm going to try for 1 minute 30 seconds later. this is the original tip from the blog:

"Touch the top of the cake with your finger. When done, you should be able to press down slightly on the cake and have it spring back but when you insert a toothpick into the cake, the toothpick should come out with wet batter on it. The trick is to cook the cakes as little as possible for a liquid center yet long enough that a firm cake-like exterior forms that won't fall apart when you take it out of the pan."

So! good luck to me later tonight! :))

time is funny

2010-04-06T01:22:00.000+08:00

today has been a day of lots of memories. i just wonder, if i could erase the last 10 years of my life, would i do it the same way all over again?

mistakes in studies. mistakes in love. mistakes in career choices.

they would probably say that mistakes and the experiences you gain, good or bad, will teach you something. but i feel like everything is still the same. i don't think i am a better person.

i remember about 6 or 7 years ago, when everyone was still on Friendster, i posted a shout-out (read: status message for FB-ers) "am i doing it right?" (why georgia-john mayer). i'm still asking myself the same question.

if i didn't have technology to remind me, would i still remember? songs on my iPod. photos on Facebook. SMSs(es?). emails.

would i still remember you? or you? or even you?

it's funny to me how our lives intertwined so closely, i knew your deepest secrets and fears, your family and friends, your hopes and dreams. and you knew mine. and now, we may as well be strangers.

i wonder if, in the event i am lucky enough to have a family one day, i should tell my daughter of all the things i know. and warn her. if you make the decision to enter someone's life, be aware that the consequences may sometimes be too much to bear.

but would she listen?

image taken from http://www.mystudios.com/artgallery/paintings/128001-128500/128113/size1.jpg

i'll put in words tomorrow

2010-03-11T21:17:00.000+08:00

morning thoughts

2010-03-10T08:36:00.000+08:00

i was having my morning coffee on the balcony when i noticed a lone red-hooded figure on the beach (?). he/she was standing on the rocks and seemed to be bending over them, searching for something. looked around for an accompanying person or dog, but there was none. reminded me of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, where he meets Clementine for the first time. the intro song started playing in my head...

then i saw a piece of plastic bag floating in the air about 10 storeys up from the main road below. reminded me of American Beauty....

damn. my life is not a movie. back to work.

again with the last minute-ness!

2010-03-08T20:19:00.000+08:00

so i haven't been posting a lot lately because i didn't get a chance to cook or go anywhere because my GA is sending me food almost every night, and because i am lazy to go out.

my family has dinners at my house every Sunday. i really REALLY miss those, and i got to join in unexpectedly the week before when my aunt had her birthday. even joined in singing Happy Birthday! my dear aunt, she is the most good-hearted and generous person i know. and OMG her food. OMG is all i can say.

yes yes, i did it all on webcam. the wonders of technology! it's made me feel a lot less alone here, being able to connect with family and friends.

i came up with this brilliant idea of attempting to recreate the dinner my aunt would make on Sunday, and have dinner with my family via webcam. BAD idea cause i procrastinated and went to the supermarket late and then ended up cooking late with my family watching on as they had what must surely have been the most stupendous fried rice in the world.

i, on the other hand, under-fried my chourico, forgot to add egg and most of all, enough oil so that the rice would not stick to the wok. i ended up with eggless, un-salty fried rice that had 30% of it stuck to the wok. sigh.

actually, to my known memory, that is the first time i have ever cooked fried rice. if not, then it must only be the second. so i have an excuse. right? :D

after the sort-of disastrous dinner (to be honest it didn't taste that bad heh) i discovered i could easily scrape off all the rest of the fried rice off the wok. it was so crunchy and yummy! (yes, i'm ignoring the fact that there was probably a ton of carcinogens in that!) so i put it in with the leftovers, determined to make a better (if not fresher) dinner the next night.

so, because today was a highly unstressful day at work (snigger), i managed to come home, leave the leftover fried rice out for a while from the fridge, get the egg beaten up (LOL! yes, i'm easily amused!) and ready, and have chicken stock at the side, ready to add. picked out and fried the pieces of chourico first, remembering to add about 2 tablespoons of oil, then dumped in the leftovers, stirred it around for a while, then put the egg in and *BLISS* everything slid around the wok beautifully, nothing got burnt and i finally got my fried rice dinner, albeit a day late.

that bit at the bottom is not chao-da-ness lah! it's chili oil! fabulous stuff! :)

my tastebuds are getting quite confused. one minute it's the same food for three days straight, the next it's OMGTODIEFOR cushy meals at The Kitchen at Grand Lisboa. These expensive dinners are seriously getting me FAT.

i wanted to take a photo of the mashed potatoes but i was too paiseh. hell, i wanted to take a photo with the mashed. i wanted to MARRY it. it was. i don't know the word for it. the best damn mashed potatoes i ever had in my LIFE. and i only had two tablespoonfuls. it was like eating something that was made of half mashed, half butter. SO creamy, SO smooth, SO...sigh~.......

i miss it.

anyway! lunch post will be done tomorrow i am too lazy now. bye!

first of many.

2010-03-03T17:29:00.000+08:00

western fried rice. MOP$18. actually not bad la...i'm tapao-ing half for dinner cause i've had 2 stressful days. sighs. want someone to massage me...:)

three.

2010-03-02T11:56:00.001+08:00

she called me ah ma and i called her ah lien. just because she would wear jeans like this.

it's very very weird. very very very weird not having you around. cause you were quite loud. and panicky at times. guess i got that from you. i need you so much in my life now. is this part of growing up? feels just like yesterday we were in Singapore, we were lying on the bed, early in the morning and you were stroking my hair. that is my best and most precious memory of you.

i miss you. every every day i miss you.

Last Minute-ly

2010-03-01T23:10:00.000+08:00

so, as per usual, i waited an hour til before dinner to decide what to do with my first quarter of Angus Beef that i bought at Royal the other day. i'd already decided on the spaghetti, and maybe some sort of salad. was searching for a black peppercorn sauce thing online and looking at the ingredients required (oyster sauce?none!cream?none!) when the Old Man called!

"what are you having for dinner?"

"i dunno i bought some steak the other day...so cheap!" (enthusiastically telling him it was US nicely marbled beef)

he then proceeded to tell me how to cook steak, as if i hadn't done it at least 20 times already. i was mmm-ing all the way then he asked what i was eating it with. i told him about my idea, then he suggested frying onions also, with the browning from the steak.

OMG Genius! too bad i don't have blue cheese to re-enact PW's droolsome recipe.

damn. i hope she doesn't see the link..and my cooking. so malu. cincai la, i want to promote her anyway.

this was my initial ingredients to use. i'm always like this one. halfway will pull out something else. i'd already decided on salad: sliced shallots, salted to take off the tang, with tomatoes and cucumbers; buttered-garlic-chili spaghetti and of course the steak. i saw the mushrooms as i was taking out the butter! so i decided to make my favourite - garlicky mushrooms, sans herbs this time cos ~~stingy/kiamsiap~~ don't have any.

i've made all of these things before ok. many times. simple shit. :D

Rolling boil (read: lots and LOTS of bubbles), almost a tablespoon of salt and some oil. i need to get olive oil! and stop being stingy. :P

after that i was supposed to go cut the onion and stuff but i got lazy and went to play Facebook. heh.

then i salted, peppered and oiled both sides of the steak. ya i know, so much marble already, i only put a biiiitt of oil ok. i love coarse black pepper! just the look of it...classy classy heh. should have brought some back from home :( Sarawak Black Pepper is the best!

yes i do admit, the steak is a bitbit grey but hey, it's cheap!

started dicing up garlic and chili and went thru the whole freaking-out-over-seeds again. i was on Skype with Diehard the whole time, he made deseeding sound so easy, but now my fingers are slightly tingly again. sigh. anyway, sliced up shallots bowl is for salad, with some salt, and more for the steak sauce :)~

i arranged it all neatly for display only! but really it does make for easier cooking and no need to wash so many bowls after :D the mushrooms were so nice and spongy, i had 2 slices raw...yumm..i think they're the chinese type mushroom? not too sure, i couldn't read the packaging :P about 14 for RM4..cheap/expensive?

i was cutting everything really slowly ok. i'm still getting back into cooking. so by the time i was done, i figured the onions must have been salted enough. added the tomatoes and cucumbers, salt and pepper. actually some lemon juice and olive oil should go in this, but no olive oil and i only had that lemonade thingy, so i put that in. lucky it had a bit of sugar, which i wanted anyway! after mixing, i put it in the freezer to chill.

started on the spaghetti first. i'd boiled it for about 6 minutes already (yes i know that sounds too long but i like mine mushy, got a problem?) so i just needed to fry the garlic and chili. got the butter and oil foaming just a little on medium-low heat (?)...

then dumped in the garlic and chili. note to self: too much chili! should have stopped at one and put more garlic instead. i'm lousy at agar-ration, always have been.

now the garlic is turning a nice nutty brown (not chao da yet!!)

we both agreed Diehard's mother would scream at the amount of butter i was using :D

then i put in the spaghetti. see! too much spaghetti, not enough garlic, dang it! was trying to mix it to coat, but that's hard to do with a wooden ladle :P i wasn't trying to fry the spaghetti, just long enough to warm it up again, maybe 45 seconds or less.

finally scraped off at least a bit more so it would look close to what i had in mind. heh. ok, spaghetti done!

*rubs hands in glee* mushrooms next! same concept, foaming butter and oil on med-low(?) heat, added chunky garlic, fried til nutty (?) :D

here go the mushrooms! they needed a lot of oil ler..i had to add a bit more halfway. but as long as you keep turning them, they're alright.

yay! just nice, not too soft, about 3-4 mins on medium-low. or whatever. i don't know. i remember how the flame looks like. that's enough!

now, the steak! mmm...ok la see i didn't use so much butter this time, only a thiin slice. butter is good for you ok. makes you strong and healthy!

added some oil to butter, got the flame quite high and let it foam for a while, then dropped my steak in with a satisfying sizzle!

ok lah i laid it down la. i don't want to get drops of hot oil all over my arms ok. i bet tons of food writers have used the phrase 'satisfying sizzle'. it's late. i'm in no mood to be original :P

1 min 20 secs on one side and 20 secs on the other, and done! look at the yummy juicy yumminess! hrm..maybe i should have cooked it a bit longer. :P oops

with the remaining butter/oil-brownbits thing..

i started frying the shallots with LOTS and LOTS of coarse black pepper in med-low (i guess) heat til they were pretty soft and pretty brown (like a doe? O.o)

..or your eyes...mmm...yes yes...:D

"your eyes are as brown as fried shallots.." sounds romantic enough to me! heh.

now for the freaky part. i wasn't too sure how this was going to work. in the end i just put 1/4 teaspoon tapioca flour i found in a drawer, with about 3ml (?) of milk.

and then! OMG! the magic happened! it thickened without getting too lumpy! YAY!!

ok la. it was a bit too thick. should have put in 2 tbsp more milk at least. but what the heck! i got me some sauce!

and there you have it! my dinner! yay to me! looks a bit extravagant but i've been living off the stew for 3 days ok, give me a break. ya i put too much chili in the spaghetti and the steak sauce was a bit too thick, but i pretty much did it! a nice dinner for myself.

and Diehard who was playing HoN. bleh. i'm used to it :D

kitchen was hell to clean after though. :P

LOST!

2010-03-01T19:12:00.001+08:00

and i didn't take any photos cause i was sweaty and tired and exhausted and sad and thirsty and....
yes. i have a bad bad sense of direction. i need my GPS :(
i did have enough time to take a photo of this:

observe the corners of the roof....

Macau is the land of the devil! all those casinos...no wonder....

yeslah. at the time i took this photo i was damn annoyed with all the steep hills and freakin mountain thingy slap in the middle of the city that i had to go around just to get to the computer place. in the end i was so hopelessly lost and tired that i just hailed a cab and got ripped off. great day huh.

enough complaining! it's a beautiful city really, great architecture :) ahem ahem. just need to do some more exploring. and bring a map. :P

never mind. i'll do better next time! yeah! positivity!

time for dinner~ i'm starving.

Cooking Class with SSOL (NOT!!)

2010-02-27T11:32:00.002+08:00

when i first started blogging, it was on Friendster (gasp!) and the blog was called '(mis)adventures of cooking' or something like that. Evryone knows i loVE food and a few have even dared to brave the waters of my home-cooked meals.

so, based on what i've told you, it should be clear that this post is NOT intended to teach you how to cook this dish. it's just chronicling my experience and serves as a reminder of any adjustments to make, should i attempt this dish again. actually, a confession is that i was quite nervous the whole way. i've no idea why...i cooked for about 2 years(?), almost everyday. it's been more than 3 years since then, so i am terribly rusty.

if anything, you'd want to try this dish out for yourself and have a few laughs at my expense while reading this post :D

i'm living in Macau now, and it was
only logical i start with a Portugese dish. i had a HUGE can of Portugese chourico that i was supposed to bring back to Malaysia but left it out at the last minute cause it was too heavy (700 grams!). i got the recipe here at one of my favourite go-to sites for dinner (thanks John!). Portugese Chourico is not to be confused with Spanish Chorizo, they're different things but i guess you could substitute one with the other if you're super-cincai like me.

Portugese Chourico Stew...here we go..

the actual ingredients called for chourico, onion, garlic, tomato sauce, potatoes, red pepper flakes, paprika and green beans. i only heeded four of the ingredients! omg! yes, i'm stingy, paprika cost almost MOP30 (RM15!) and i don't like green beans and the onions were going at about RM1 EACH! so i used

shallots in place of onion,
tomato paste instead of sauce,
chili flakes/seeds from chilli oil instead of the flakes, (from the red jar)
carrots instead of green beans

yeah i know. i'm not staying true to the original dish. it's a bastardised poor version. what the hell! i'm cooking for myself only. so i don't care :D

(see the small red plastic bag behind? thats for my rubbish. ya i'm gross and throw my rubbish on the same top as the one i prepare my food. told you, this is NOT a cooking guide! be prepared for more disgustingness!)

i was so excited about eating something new that i took out the chourico and started dicing them first. ok i admit, i already cooked with them earlier in the day, nothing fancy, just fried them with shallots, tomatoes and scrambled eggs for breakfast. they were DAMN salty but that's my fault. they came in a can that i'll show you later. they were in oil with some peppercorns and cloves, which i thought was so cute :D

i used about one and a half, and after i had started cutting up a half, i realised that i should have taken the casing off, so i started pulling them off with my fingernails from the small diced bits. feeling pleased with myself, i started cutting up the whole one, only to remember that i forgot to take off the casing again. (insert Hokkien expletive here) so i had to peel them off the small diced bits instead of just cutting the chourico in half and pulling it off the whole thing.

then i started chopping up the veggies. then i remembered you should prepare veggies before meat to avoid contamination. then i didn't care and continued. :P

i decided to throw in some chilli for i-don't-remember-what-reason, maybe the added vitamin C or antioxidants? heh. recipe called for one small onion so i used 3 small shallots and 2 cloves of minced garlic.

i have bad bad memories of stinging, painful hands in secondary school ERT class while using chili so i was DAMN freaked out when deseeding the chilis. i actually washed the chili ok i was that scared!

then i remembered i read somewhere that if your hands are oiled, it will protect your skin from the c-something in the chili seeds. i forgot la. MissC has a DAMN funny (not to her i think) story about that on her blog and i didn't want to end up like that. my fingers were already oiled from the sausages so i did a little 'yay' in my heart :D yes i live alone but i don't want to start talking to myself yet ok!

i didn't peel the potatoes cos, as i told you, i'm gross. at least i washed them ok! so i didn't think to figure out if the apartment had a peeler but thank God i found one! at first i only peeled halfway and diced that part up. then i decided i needed more and peeled the rest.

i'm so indecisive that way. and bad at agar-ration.

suddenly i had this great idea of putting mushrooms! yet another bastardization in progress! it's opened weirdly cause i don't know how to use the can opener and two bits of the cover were stuck to the can still. whatever lah. as long as it can get half-open enough already for me. i used half a can cos I LOVE MUSHROOMS and it's precious to me!

so here we go. two medium potatoes, diced, one carrot, diced, and half a can of mushrooms, quartered. :D

this whole food blogging business. not easy lah. added like half an hour to the cooking!

i used 1 1/2 tablespoons of oil from the sausages, and one teaspoon from the chilli oil, just for flavour and kicks :D got the cookerhood going (that word is just really weird to me) and started by frying the onions garlic chili for a bit. 'just to get the flavour out' or whatever that means.

can you see the end of the black plastic spatula? mann i hate using plastic to cook. i couldn't find anything else in the kitchen. freaks me out cause last time i checked, the one at home was all melted at the end. eeeeeee.....

then i dumped in the diced chourico (i keep wanting to type chorizo, ishish) and fried that for another minute (plus? plusplus? who knows!). the smell was GREAATT because, other than that rich meaty flavour, the chourico has some other smoky yummy spices in it that delivers a mouth-watering smell..hey i was cooking really late ok! so hungry at that time!

cheap! tomato paste. forgot how much but i remember it was cheap. heh. i used the whole can! and regretted it. tell you why later.

in goes the paste with some water, enough to cover the chourico..

after stirring it around, i dumped the potatoes, carrots and mushrooms in. i REGRET! i think i should have fried it like i do with the Japanese curry thing. as in, fry onions etc, add chourico and fry, then add potatoes etc and fried, then add water and stuff. dang nammit! oh well, next time :P

by the way! i finally found a wooden spoon thing in a drawer! the shape is kinda weird for cooking but at least it's not plastic :S ewww..

here is where the red pepper flakes and paprika goes in. so, in my cheapo version, here is where my red chilli oil bits-of-thing goes in. cheap ler! only rm3! i love chili oil, not easy to get in E. Malaysia :P

let it all boill.... that black bit is the chili oil, in case you're wondering. i tasted it and it was kinda lacking something...some ooOMPh...probably cause i skimped on the paprika..sigh..

then i had a brilliant idea! powdered chicken stock! you can't live without this man. but...why oh WHY did i buy knorr's?? i think maggi is less salty. i have no idea what i was thinking..anyway i dumped about less than half a teaspoon in..

it says to leave it for 25-30 minutes. then i suddenly remembered i hadn't cooked rice. heh. :D at least that's one thing i know how to do right :P

oh yea, this is the can that the chourico came in. yes i opened it upside down. oops. i kept the can cause i thought it might be useful for something (yes i'm stingy that way :P) and it was! i dumped my wooden ladle in while i was waiting for the stew to cook. heh.

do you know how much this can of chourico costs!? ZOMG ok. it's like a bit over RM30, or MOP63, according to Royal Supermarket's price. about six large sausages inside. so maybe it's ok la. about rm5 for one sausage? i used that for breakfast with the eggs and all, lasted me til dinner...so i guess it's cheap?
weird rationalization, i know.

while waiting for the food to cook, i decided to take some photographic evidence for you, that i did buy fruits! see! i listened to you! hehe. rm2.50 for bananas and rm5 for the apples (8). ok or not?

this is some other stuff i bought last night. RM7 for sesame oil man. my heart just breaks. i don't think they have that brand i usually get at home. maybe it's malaysian? the lemon drink is a desperate attempt to use it for lemon juice. but i tasted it and i don't think it's going to work all that well. first off, it's kinda fizzy? and it's a bit sweet. might work for some things but definitely not salad :(

so after 25 minutes, this is what it looks like. all globby! then i realised....i should have used tomato PUREE! what la. tomato paste is just way too thick for this. sigh. next time. it was a bit sour for me so i cut it by trying a tablespoon of the lemon drink i got, and some sugar. it was okkk lah.

i finally gave up on trying to tweak it when the rice was done. too hungry already! i think next time i really need to use a REAL onion, just for that sweet tang. this is what you get for being stingy.

are you mad? of course i don't normally eat like this! this is just for display. normally i would mix up everything in a bowl and just eat. that's the kind of girl i am :D the cucumber would have remained in its original state and i would have just chomped off it in intervals to cut the richness of the stew. but for you, i did it all up, so you'd have even more of a reason to think i'm a good girlfriend :D and hurry up and come visit!

sorry this photo is upside down! can you spot the difference? made it just for you ;) don't ask me why there's no G, i was too lazy :D

the result? it wasn't too bad, i usually don't like my own cooking anyway. except on really rare occasions. cause by the time all the cooking is done, you're just tired and hungry. heh. definitely tomato puree next time. or a mix of puree and paste. and definitely use an onion. DBS is probably going to complain i didn't use enough meat.

okay off to lunch. guess what i'm having? the leftovers! :P

cold cold cold~

2010-02-08T13:01:00.001+08:00

means i'm having a hard time drying my clothes...argh..luckily my 'guardian angel' in Macau got me one of these

so paiseh ok! she didn't even let me pay her...grr...i don't know how am i going to make up for her kindness...wish i could bring back durian for her since she seems to love it a lot...hehhe..
yea it looks weird right...DBS christianed it as R2D2 after i showed him a photo online LOL. works pretty okay though it doesn't really evenly dry the clothes, which i'm guessing is my fault...i might have put in one too many hehe.

anyway this

MGM Lion's Bar image from http://www.macau24.com/data/1252565395.07412_lions_bar.jpg

and this is where i went on saturday night...so happening ler! ahha...lucky to meet friends like that...very kind and generous people..

Cubic at AIA tower; image taken from http://www.hongkonghustle.com/wp-content/photos/club_Cubic_Macau_nightlife.jpg

it's cold and raining and i've a ton of things to do...sigh..home in 5 days! whoopdeedoo~!!

back in civilisation!!

2010-02-06T17:23:00.000+08:00

yess~~ after three weeks of 'toughing it out' i'm finally back in Casinoland. happy~!!

soo many things to sort out. least of all my computer. running on Safe Mode is the only way i can get it to work. hence no photos cause can't use the Bluetooth. i'm soo sorry Satellite..i promise i'll try to treat you better! you're my only lifeline to home..

worst thing happened today. i finally resigned myself to the fact that i must have left my lipgloss pouch in the hotel i was at in the beginning of my trip. there must have been at least ten glosses in there. *heartbreak* my Bloom lipgloss in Watermelon...my two Diors...OWHmygosh...kill me...how will i ever show my face at MGM tonight? all i have left are the Bigelow, Sportsgirl and two lipglosses from Mommy Dearest that i hardly ever use cos God help me, i was never even close to being as fair as she was.

never mind. gives me an excuse to stock up again. but oh, the moolah involved..

miss you guys back home. see you in a week!!

leaving again

2010-01-05T13:33:00.000+08:00

apologies for the mosquito netting in the way. someone conveniently put it there as soon as i was ready to snap the photo :P

so. another great adventure. have a feeling it's not going to be so great. all the loose ends untied..not that it hasn't happened before. 我不能放心走, you get what i mean?

dammit. why does it have to be so hard? i've already planned this ages ago. i'm leaving. don't give me any more shit please. just give way a bit la. will die kah?

love all of you anyway. anyone who knows me relatively well and is reading this now. see you soon..

good morning world..

2009-12-22T06:46:00.001+08:00

hopefully today will be a good day :)

an arc of blue light..

2009-12-20T18:14:00.002+08:00

when i saw it, i knew there was only one thing i wanted...

but now i think about it, it could happen in many ways..

how now..

2009-12-02T16:44:00.000+08:00

this is the saddest time i've ever had since Mom left.

and it's all my fault.

independent woman

2009-10-21T02:36:00.002+08:00

a challenge i have to face.

can lah!

i can always just jump off that tower if too despo. but have to save RM450 first!

trying...trying...

2009-10-09T18:35:00.000+08:00

i miss you. so much.

where did you go?

come back soon..

LL (Lonely Lunch)

2009-08-01T16:36:00.002+08:00

perks

2009-07-20T14:48:00.001+08:00

just realised a good thing about my current employed state

people are actually paying to listen to me talk.

yay!

19

2009-07-20T00:42:00.002+08:00

saw a typical chinese calendar today. it's sunday so the day was marked in red. the date stood out more than ever on most months.

have you moved on? i should be happy.

Facade

2009-07-04T00:47:00.004+08:00

went to hijau for a quick booze fix. been having dinner-supper days for the last 2, wonder if it assists in weight gain or loss? sadly, i'd assume it would be the former.

singha beer is yummy :)

had hoped the alcohol would help with sleep deprivation, but am still wide-eyed half an hour after getting home. i remember someone told me that most 'medications' should kick in after about 10 minutes so i guess my hopes are in vain.

yes, 2 beers. don't be fooled boys and girls, it doesn't guarantee a happy ending.

ironic

2009-06-27T04:30:00.001+08:00

as if i didn't know! look to the right if you don't know what i'm talking about.

do you know what i clicked next? heh.

這是我的溫柔..

2009-05-17T12:04:00.004+08:00

五月天 - 温柔 (live)

my favourite version. the end where he basically screams "woooooahh.." it's like just letting evrything out..giving up..

i remember...a dark and cold night. sitting up in bed and crying, listening to this song. while you were sleeping oh so soundly next to me.

you will never understand why.

五月天 - 生命有一種絕對

2009-05-16T12:33:00.000+08:00

scents and memories

2009-04-16T02:29:00.003+08:00

i just realised it's 2.29 a.m and i have less than 2 hours to go before waking the LOG up. what was i so immersed in?

http://www.instyle.com/instyle/makeover?action=showMakeover&tab=eyeshadow

for those of the feminine persuasion :D upload your photo onto InStyle's virtual makeover and they give you everything; celeb hairstyles which you can pull and push to match your own face. like the style but the color's not for you? you can change that, plus add high- and low-lights to your preference. my favourite part? the contacts! i soo wanna get green, blue and gray now!

anyway. the point of this post. you know how the smell of washing powder makes you think of Sunday laundry, while the smell of hot tyres takes you back to exciting dark nights on certain long strips of roads outside of your hometown? (ok, that could just be me :P)

and then there's that smell...the one you've never smelt before but feels all so familiar somehow..like coming home...

i think that one's a keeper..don't you? :)

Bling Ring

2009-04-07T16:10:00.003+08:00

been watching a LOT of movies lately and am in the middle of Almost Famous, one of those cult movies i'd been meaning to watch for ages. check out the Elton John song from this movie, Tiny Dancer, introduced to me by Ting, an ex-housemate of mine. i miss leeching his songs! :P

getting back on track, i've watched some movies that have 'inspired' me to make purchases that i would not normally have, just cause they look so good on the movie star! yeah ok, i'm far from, but we can all dream :D

doesn't Kate Hudson look adorable peeking out from between her fingers? :D

so next on my list will be a bling ring, as in a ginormous (FAKE) stone sitting pretty on my (right?left?) hand. yay! budget:RM30! hope it doesn't make my already short and stubby fingers look even more stubbier but, eh, i've always loved the boho look. anyway if you notice in the photo, her fingers aren't that long either and her nails are short and round

good luck to me!!

you're just smoke

2009-04-05T20:44:00.002+08:00

inordinate number of posts. no freaking wonder. i blame my curiosity, as usual.

i knew there was a reason i lined my eyes completely today. RAH!

Goodbye and Good Luck

2009-04-05T13:19:00.003+08:00

about 2 years ago i chanced on this blog. Her pictures were simple yet meaningful, they were stories that i could really relate to. i even made a phone theme out of her work! and she also seems to have a good guy friend that funnily enough is called Pandaboy :DDD

now it seems she has decided to end her online career, possibly because she has finally found happiness elsewhere and has no more need to pour her feelings on to paper and online. i am happy for her but at the same time selfishly sad because i don't have her drawings to look forward to anymore.

funny how it seems she found 'life' again almost a year after i did. :D

if you haven't stumbled on her site, you're indeed lucky because you have a whole set of new drawings for you to discover at your leisure. i hope one day she will continue drawing again of her new happy life in a stable relationship and hopefully about her views on other things as well.

goodbye, stickgal, and all the best! thanks for making me feel less alone in my past crappiness :)

Fug

2009-04-05T12:59:00.004+08:00

i was rereading the first few chapters of Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix (of which i have 2 copies, go figure..any buyers?) and i stumbled upon this word, fug. why i don't remember it, i have no idea, possibly due to my 'fast' reading style which sometimes causes me to skim past words :D

anyway it was something about the boy wizard breathing on a window and creating a misty fug. at first i thought it was a typo. so i looked it up on Google definitions and it is a real word!

Web definitions for fug
	(British informal) an airless smoky smelly atmosphere

nice how you learn something new everyday. or rather, relearn, in this case. however, the definition says smoky and smelly. is she insinuating that Potter is an underaged cancer stick fan? or maybe he indulged in my favourite dish from Chili's ;)

cool word. shall try to insert it somehow soon :)

my HAUL

2009-04-04T03:15:00.007+08:00

ok lah. i am a closet beauty addict. some friends have caught a glimpse of this from the number of lipglosses i carry in my bag. but honestly it started out harmlessly when my cousin bought me my 1st ever lippie from Revlon called Girly :D it was a sheer glittery pink and somehow i used it for everything - blusher and eyeshadow included. so innovative yah :D

after that i dabbled here and there but never really got into it till maybe like 2 years ago when the Old Man announced that he had some vouchers for Kris Shop (y'know, the SIA in-flight shopping), handed me a catalogue and let me pick out some stuff. oh boy. wrong move. there were so many things to choose from! in the end i settled for a Dior travel palette and a set of 3 Guerlain Meteorites.

click to view larger photo with text

so sometime after that, i had a LOT of free time (as i do now..:P) and stumbled upon some beauty sites where the average (or not-so-average) Jane would post up tutorials on how to use eyeshadows that had more than one color, etc. i started reading them with an avid fascination and the result is what you see above, as of today.
mind you, it's not like i bought all of this. the travel palettes were free, mascaras, one e/s set and DiorKisses were lovingly donated by Godma, who's given me enough makeup that i really shouldn't ask for anymore!

More close-ups..
the above photo are the products i use most, the Revlon e/s quad is great for smoky eyes and the Maybelline blushers come with highlighters which i love. the brushes aren't that great though.
my favourite lipglosses to date which i've only been able to find in the States so far, C.O Bigelow. I love the mintiness!
The Bare Escentuals mineral makeup which provides the exact kind of coverage i've been looking for all this while, you totally don't look too made-up at all.
I love my L'oreal liner in choc brown, it's not as heavy as black would look and i've been using it for ages. Body Shop clear mascara is great for opening up your eyes a little without the heavy thick look that black would give, but for the special occasions I rave to everyone who's asking about the Diorshow mascara that i got together with the Travel studio, it's AWESOME! no curler necessary!
and last but not least, my RM3 find! yeah i know what you're thinking (my eyes are burning!!) but seriously it's worked well for me so far and the color payoff is terrific. a bit too shimmery for me so i like to use it with the matte shadows like the Red Earth ones. am still on the lookout for more (saw a 48 color palette for only Rm13!!)
yep, i've gone so far as to purchase a MAC brush set for an outrageous price...i'm still justifying it evrytime i use the brushes though, they definitely give a different look to application. and look at the cute red container i got to go with them! now i put all my other junk in them too :D
oh yeah, the first picture lacked another 2 pencils i have, the light green one was a donation from Godma, it's a black creamy-ish liner that's sparkly and the brown one is a L'oreal brow pencil with grooming brush on the cap. i thought was high time for me to get one as my eyebrows aren't that thick :( and i've only recently entered the harsh painful world of plucking.
The tan brush is from Bare Escentuals, a great one for the mineral makeup, although still a bit poky on the face. oh and you can see my Ganache for Lips balm that i got from Aust, the Choc Mint flavour is yummiiez~it's made from all natural ingredients, including real Bavarian chocolate :)~~ the creator is a lady who suffered from breast cancer and couldn't find any 'organic' products out there so she decided to create one herself, way to go!
these are my favourite brushes, the top is from MAC, it's a great soft blusher brush. First and third from bottom are my blending brushes and the middle one in white is an awesome brush that i got for dirt cheap from TJ Maxx in the states, an angled liner brush which is fantastically soft to the touch yet stiff enough to apply a beautifully thin line of color wherever you like. the big fat short brush on top is also from BE, i mostly use it after blusher just to blend evrything together :)Olay is by far the best moisturiser (drugstore anyway, i miss my Biotherm still :~) that i've found, it worked especially well for me in Aust with all that dry weather and harsh winds. the bareVitamins i got with my BE minerals, it's to "prep" skin before makeup. sometimes i get lazy using the Olay and just use this instead, it works well enough.
SK II eyecream was FREE (as if i have so much money to splurge on eyecream!) from KrisShop as well, i love it that he flies SIA :)) but i had the Olay when i went to the States before i got SK II. both work okay i guess, the texture for Olay is a little heavier but i don't really see any difference with SK II but i blame it on the late nights :P
i love the L'oreal makeup remover, the layer of oil on top really helps with stubborn liner and mascara. i switched to Simple cause L'oreal is a tad more expensive but Simple is crap with the heavier stains, i have to add baby oil on my cotton pad together with the Simple to really get them out :( i think i'll switch back after God-knows-when-am-i-going-to-finish-with-the-Simple!
the three bottles in the middle are scented lotions from Bath and Body Works in the States and they smell ZOMG :))) from left to right, Cucumber Melon, Sweet Pea and Freshwater Cucumber. i totally regret not getting Sea Island Cotton :(( the fragrances are pretty strong though, i like this cause i don't have to use perfume anymore! Diehard's favourite is Freshwater Cucumber :) but i like Sweet Pea when i'm feeling girly :P
on the far left is some "high-clak" hotel lotion that Old Man gave me, but the smell's really nice (packaging says White Moss by Acca Kappa) and the moisture level is just right for our hot and humid climate. and ok, yes, i'm also showcasing my damned deodorant, but i think it's great cos i, erm, tend to get kinda sticky easily and Dove clinical protection (yes damn you i do need clinical strength deo!) is very long-lasting and has my favourite green tea scent as well.
the brown product lying on its side is Revlon Skinlights which belonged to Mommy Dearest before i stole it from her (heh heh) and i mix it with lotion before applying to my shins if i'm prepping for a special occasion, to give my legs a glow and distract from all the yukky chicken-skin and mozzie bites :P the pale yellow tube is Frederic Fekkai glossing cream for my super dry hair (before it turns oily after 24 hrs) and you only need a pea-sized amount for the whole head so it lasts pretty long, a good deal for USD$8.
i so regret perming my hair now cause i need like 15 mins or more just to get it ready if i need to make it look good and un-frizzy. the Sunsilk mousse works alright i guess, it's my first time using mousse but i still feel it's a tad pricey. the smell is prety yummie tho :)
Paul Mitchell has been with me since Aust (am i using expired product??) and i used it before i bought the mousse. it doesn't really have great staying power though, which might be expected as the bottle says Medium Hold, but my gripe is that the spray nozzle doesn't work well, it stays down for the first few sprays and you have to pull it up again. the smell is overwhelming and vomity! also, cause it's water-based (?) residue sticks to the bottom and the point of the nozzle, which you have to peel off evrytime before you use it. grr. now it's only for when i don't want such a bouncy look :D
the tri-wheat leave-in conditioner at the end sucks. but it's ok, cause i paid USD$3 only. i don't see any change in my hair at all after use :P
lastly, my scents! the pretty escada bottle i inherited from Mommy Dearest, i love it cause it smells like she's around when i use it, but sparingly though cause i definitely don't want to finish it. very strong scent with major overtones (?) of mango, so it's the spray-in-the-air-and-walk-through variety.
i got the tommy girl when i was 15! it stinks now but it was my favourite scent so i saved it till it went bad :( how sad! i got a red lipstick with it too but Old Man made me give it to Mommy Dearest. ARGH.
Elizabeth Arden Green Tea was an Xmas gift that Mommy Dearest got a long while back and she didn't like it so i got it! perks of being the only lala daughter in the house :DD this isn't the original bottle, actually this one was given by ...'s mom. still appreciate it a lot though :) she's such a sweetheart. this is my all-time favourite scent, although tainted with bad memories :P so i'm on the lookout for a new one.
Davidoff Cool Water has a GREAT story behind it, i signed up for TM Rewards when it first came out and after quite a while, one day, when no one was home, the phone rang. and it was from TM Rewards!! so they listed my options and i went for the DVD player which i'd been bugging Old Man to get but he just wouldn't budge, and this Davidoff for myself, since i was the one who hard-workingly went to sign up for it. thank God Mommy Dearest wasn't home, or she'd have snapped up some cooking appliance that would've gathered dust at the back of some cupboard for years. :DD well, of course i didn't tell them about it, just waited till the things got in the mail and surprised them with my lovely story! Mommy Dearest was so torn between wanting to yell at me and being amused that i'd gone behind her back and done all that :DDDD
anyway, Davidoff CW is also quite a strong scent and seems to be quite popular, i know a number of people who are in love with the smell. for some reason guys love it too ;)))))))

okay that's my haul! omg, so exhausting. if you'd like reviews of a particular cosmetic or swatches, let me know and i'll do a new post on it.

i barely blog anymore and this was an incredibly long post. hope the next one's about food! i'm cooking lunch tomorrow and the ingredients on hand are chicken pieces, cream and white wine maybe. hope he likes it!

may the darkness bring light to the future..

2009-03-28T20:43:00.003+08:00

short snaps of life is proud to be a part of Earth Hour 2009! with the support of Old Man and the exception of my modem and Kakak's tv (cos we are too scared to tell her to turn it off lest she gets bored and starts talking to us :D), the whole house is off electricity. oh yea plus my fridges and water purifier thingy la. wad to do.

alas, apparently the neighbours are not as socially conscious as we are *ahem ahem* haha. out of 20 houses that i can see, a maximum of 5 are lights-out. kudos to the indian house 15 degrees of my front gate, they have a huge compound which is brilliantly lit almost evrynight, but not tonight!

let there be hope in the darkness..

also ho...if we keep doin this...then no need for the 12 freakin dams they wanna build right!

diminished

2009-03-23T15:56:00.000+08:00

i am less than i was.

is it worth it?

history repeating..

Kuching's Best

2009-03-17T14:16:00.002+08:00

i've got an idea for a new blog. no, it's not going to be my new blog, this is still my own narcissistic view on the world but yeah, i've been wondering what the best places are to go for certain services and purchases etc. don't get dirty now, i mean places like best nail salon, haircuts etc.

don't know how long i can keep it up for but let's just give it a shot

www.kuchingsbest.blogspot.com

if i can keep it up, i'll use it to get me some moolah :D

so send in your comments and i'll go check the places out. thaaanks:D

buy me a drink

2009-03-10T17:10:00.003+08:00

so was having a discussion with Diehard and i just realised something.

apart from me pretending not to know or the person being under obligation to do so due to family/friend relations, no guy, and i mean no guy has ever bought me a drink. isn't that sad? at 25 years of age, apparently i wasn't(still am not?) too hot enough for a guy to buy me a drink. or just because he likes my (??) personality. either that or i'm John Wayne when it comes to whipping out wallets.

why? why? whyy??

so despo-sounding :P

another thing just came to me. i think i've bought more drinks for guys than have been bought me. zomg.

so next time if you are of the male persuasion and don't mind the imminent threat of Diehard's fist bearing down on your (hopefully chiselled) jaw, please? pretty please? :D

i'm so effing bored.

2009-01-13T01:15:00.000+08:00

i need to GET OUT OF HERE.

meanwhile, something to entertain.

Come Round Soon - Sara Bareilles

poof

2008-12-19T00:45:00.001+08:00

sorry. you may be comfortable this way but i am hurting inside. i don't want to be hurt again.

Thank you`!!!

2008-12-15T18:29:00.002+08:00

i was drifting in and out of a boredom-induced coma when a surprise sms came in the early afternoon today. so about a hour and a half ago, my knight in shining black armor showed up in THIS!!!
no it's not the exact same car but very similar, i am so sakai over getting to ride in it ok~!! and i don't even have to admit it, cause evryone knows i'm sakai hehe :D yes i know it's just a car, but ohhh look at it~~ so nice and BLACK and shinyy....~~

anyway... THANNKK YOUU~!!! A bigbig thankyou to you, Ink'D~!! for taking time out of your busy wedding day schedule to have a drink and a long talk with me. (no, dear readers, not his wedding! :D not yet anyway!) your honesty, opinions and good advice are very very much appreciated. i feel a whole lot better now after busting my brains for 2 days trying to figure things out. i don't know if i am able to put your advice to good use, but please know that you've made me feel a HEAP WHOLE LOT better about myself~!!

and daannngg boy you look good in a suit :D:D:D like barney stintson! but not pervy and sex-crazed tho :D hugs man. thanks again :)

it's a beautiful day

2008-12-15T15:11:00.000+08:00

that's what he said.

but i am alone.

:P my fault. again.

thou shalt not

2008-12-14T22:44:00.005+08:00

since she's gotten home, Tassie and i have reverted back to the old days of occasionally letting a really small matter amuse us to the point where i am clutching my stomach in pain, tears pouring down my cheeks from laughing too hard and trying not to look at her for fear i may never ever stop laughing ever again.

tonight was one of those nights. it started with a thumb war when i accused her of cheating and right after that, she won fair and square. the element of surprise is always against me :P. i don't know what got into me but after that i asked her if she would help me break one of my commandments.

thou shalt not smoke.

i've been breaking a lot of them over the years. thou shalt not date a smoker. thou shalt not date a younger guy. thou shalt not date a housemate. oh well. they are not such completely bad commandments to break. but there are reasons for not breaking them in the first place. such as: the bad taste, the clash of opinions, the complications that arise when the both of you are no longer dating.

the reason i am breaking this commandment? to be brutally honest, simple curiosity and also, to tell the smokers that i meet, yes i have tried it and yes, it sucks like shit.

it was a hilarious experience though. one of the things i love about Tassie is that she never questions my decisions unless of course she thinks it's a seriously bad idea. and hardly anything is a seriously bad idea to Tassie. She brought me outside and we sat in the wrought-iron chairs while i held the cigarette like an incense stick to try and light it. of course i was trying to be funny!

um. anyway.

so she demonstrated to me how to suck in, open your mouth, inhale and then exhale the smoke out. at least i think that's how it goes. we were laughing so hard the whole time. i think i only got it right two times. and yes dear readers, i did cough. both times. not too badly though. apparently the way i hold the cigarette is freaking noobish. in the end i just held it like a joint. lol. i think i wasted half the cigarette just holding it and bent over laughing my ass off. as we were about to finish, a god-like shout came from above.

"come up here!!"

the Old Man has just got back from two weeks worth of business travel. poor baby. anyway, after he yelled, i was just about to run upstairs like the good obedient puppy-daughter i am (heh) when i suddenly realised the situation i was in and clapped my hand over my mouth. that only brought on another torrent of gasping laughter for Tassie and i. luckily he had brought back some mints from HK (heyy they're forest berry flavoured ok!) and i grabbed two before running upstairs.

found this on the net thanks to visionary-girl.blogspot.com. it's the exact same ones that the Old Man bought back! they must be popular flavours.

i thought i was in deep shit but he only wanted me to put on some Skin Repair lotion on his back. geeeez. i thoughtfully warmed it between my hands before i rubbed it on too! what a good daughter am i :)

so. now my hands smell like Diehard's used to do. kinda nice actually. :) Tassie is going to buy some Vogue for me tomorrow. no, not the magazine.

i promise i won't be addicted! :D

two-faced kitten

2008-11-24T20:08:00.000+08:00

see. there is such a thing. and in Perth too. :P

membanteras penyakit denggi!

2008-11-17T18:01:00.002+08:00

today the government gave me free Ridsect.

that is good cause i am getting a lot of mosquito bites.

the Old Man is so not seksi with his shirt off. how to find girlfriend like that? :D :D :D nm i still lub yew daddy!

speechless

2008-11-10T22:50:00.002+08:00

and here it comes again.

i don't know what to say and it is just as well because i know (and yes i know) that nothing anyone says now is worth saying.

but you know i'll be there for you. and that's a given. no matter our situation.

cheese omelette.

Congratulations

2008-11-05T20:18:00.002+08:00

a first in history. i am sure you will do them proud.

just don't forget the rest of us?

All Soul's Day

2008-11-02T16:59:00.003+08:00

am i a day late?

anyway, here's to you. time does not heal all wounds. just makes it slightly bearable.

apologies for the non-updates. don't think you want to read all emo shite right now, eh? maybe i'll put up New York tomorrow. i owe DBS that much.

Menthe l'eau.

2008-10-13T01:58:00.002+08:00

image credits to cakochocolat of flickr.

my new favourite drink?

although the one i had was blue. blueblueblue..

Joyeux anniversaire to me~

2008-10-09T06:46:00.002+08:00

24.

and i still feel like i haven't learnt anything.

in an hour and a half i will be flying home. and everything will seem like it was years and years ago.

c'est la vie :)

Stuck again!

2008-09-30T03:09:00.003+08:00

so i'm in Charlotte Airport now, about 3 hours after being informed my flight to JFK has been delayed (TWICE) from 1.50 to 3pm then 5.30pm!! walked around for a bit then my freakin lappie bag got too heavy for me and was searching allll around for a powerpoint to charge my Tosh baby..so finally settled for Burger King!
Charlotte Airport has graciously offered wireless internet throughout the place, so i'm able to pass time and blog while enjoying my Double Whopper with fries and Dr Pepper (mmm :)))
i guess anything is good when you're hungry! but this is amazing (hey i haven't had a bite to eat all day k!!)! two luscious juicy beef patties with spongy sesame seed bun, actually crispy lettuce and tomatoes which the juice hasn't been all wrung out of!

best part: tangy green pickles...mmmm..............

fries are good too! but still can't wait to eat NYC food with DBS + 1 tonight~! yay yaayyy~~~

Andy McKee~!!!

2008-09-27T09:20:00.000+08:00

John, you GOTTA see this.

thanks, A!!

My Last Day

2008-09-27T08:47:00.004+08:00

was like..

rushing around, freaked out i couldn't get my last project done in time..cold, wet, running from one building to another, getting my jeans soaked, clacking around in my impractical but strangely comfortable Aerosoles wedges, having my badge taken away (! *sob*)

frantically taking photos, feeling a strange (VERY FREAKING STRANGE) sense of detachment as i said goodbye to everyone. is this my way of dealing with difficult moments now?

i'm still on Mac-mode, doing alt+(key) instead of Ctrl. i am going to miss that glorious widescreen.

i will miss everyone. some people more than most. found a friend in the last place i expected. i hope it's mutual. the conversations have kept me sane for all this while.

did a last and final (insert name here) and left my adapter and phone charger at the office. JEEZ. lucky that JK is home sick and could get the computer cord off her. so, back to the office on Monday i guess!

it was fun :)

3 days to New York. phoo.....i'm nervous.

bright lights, big city. bring me back to me..

Alicia Keys - No One

2008-09-26T03:05:00.003+08:00

truth?

truth is..this song makes me feel happy. it reminds me of a Valentine's night where i was just getting to know someone who would show me a different kind of love and care i'd never had before. the song was blasting from a club downstairs and i had that miniscule, fluttering feeling of getting to know someone for the first time and finding out you like the things you're finding out. a lot.

yes, it's different. very different. but why would i want what i had before? they obviously didn't work.

so, if you tell me it's the truth, i would be very happy indeed.

Fragrant Rice - Jay Chou

2008-09-25T04:59:00.002+08:00

when i feel like absolute crap, you always know how to cheer me up! yay~ can't wait for your album.

even though you ARE a capricorn. guess it can't be helped.

追不到的梦想换个梦不就得了
so true! :)

hai gua...hai gua.. :))))))))

What it Feels Like for a Girl

2008-09-23T22:57:00.001+08:00

i want this right now.

credits to DBS for introducing this site to me.

13 minutes

2008-09-19T00:00:00.000+08:00

to 12am. i feel like i'm back in the days of refusing to sleep cause i didn't want to waste time.

then after that. it was simply because i could not. because if i lay there, in the dark, alone, everything would come rushing to me at once. and it was unbearable.

maybe i'm just feeling uncomfortable (read: ngiawy) because the cat isn't with me tonight. or that i botched up my hair-curling, which i knew i would.

yes, i'm writing randomly. i just feel like blogging.

i should be excited. in a week and 3 days i will be exploring one of the greatest cities in the world, my dream city since i was in primary school.

maybe that will do it. bring that feeling of wonder and amazement and rush that i miss so much from the old me.

it's all your fault.

McDonalds country ham biscuit

2008-09-12T20:49:00.002+08:00

so i was sitting at my desk idly flicking through news and wondering when i would finally appreciate the rumblings in my tummy and go heat up yet another muffin for my first bite of the day.
image taken from http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2201/2448552537_38c01882c9.jpg?v=0

suddenly an angel in a cable-knit sweater descended and presented me with this! thank you SO much, R! ladies and gentlemen, i present to you the best thing since sliced bread, the McDonalds Country Ham Biscuit!

yea. i thought it was a cookie too. it's southern for BUN!

omg. biscuits are. the BEST thing. crumbly fluffy, still-warm, with a delicious salty piece of country ham in the middle. last night i had one KFC biscuit and i sopped up my sambal sauce with it. WOW. MAN.

4 weeks more and i will try the recipe out back home in the kitchen!

a hole in my wallet

2008-09-11T10:40:00.003+08:00

i finally found a place to stay in NYC. the money is probably not worth it, but i bet Old Man stopped sweating when i told him the location, a block away from Times Square. here's a preview..

its right next to the Majestic Theater which hosts the Phantom of the Opera play. so i don't really have an excuse to go...even if i fork out $37 for a seat all the way in the back, i can still say i watched the Phantom in NYC!

so the trip is less than a month away and let me tell you, i seem to be not good at all on saving money for it...if you want to come to Winston-Salem and shop, MommyK is your best guide!

i always thought that i would love to have someone pick out stuff and say 'here, get this', and i found her! she's helped, or actually forced me to get things i wouldn't normally cause i'd jus say it's not me..i swear this is my mother's revenge on me, she always said i was AhMa and i told her she was AhLian :D.

TJ Maxx is hell for my wallet and MommyK is the devil LOL i got this Kathy van Zeeland bag for $35, i don't think it's that bad to spend on this bag, it doesn't have alll the pockets i'd like it to have but it is a good size and a nice cheery yellow.
a definite change from what i'm used to buying, i have to tell you! i don't know why, i'm always used to getting 'safe' drab colours. at least it's less drastic than the zebra-print belted one she initially wanted me to get at SteinMart!
it's even got its own bling for added 'AhLian-ness' :Di can hear you now. "where the hell are you going to wear that?" i don't know either but i love them! they are so cute! when i got this i also got my Winston-Salem killer heels, $15 for a pair of sexy shiny black BCBGirls heels. that was my absolute favourite buy cos it was so damn cheap.

and of course MommyK found a pair of gold wedges at TJ Maxx for $10. how to turn down i tell you?! it looked soo cool with my newly pedi-ed black toenails (pedi was also a first!).

yeah, i sound like a shopaholic. but i rarely go out to eat or even ANYWHERE here okay. so it's worth all of it! it's great spending my own money for the first time :)

wah. so late liaw. goodnight!

heavy heavy head

2008-09-09T10:27:00.003+08:00

and possibly

sounds fun and exciting! but planning for it? omg headACHE man..

i'm sure it'll be worth it though!

just go for it, cause i probably won't get a chance for a holiday like this for a long, long time.

and YOU, you damn idiot, putting so many questions in my head now. but i have to admit you are right about most things though. but still. my argument is that ignorance is bliss.

i guess my main question now, that applies to evrything is, should i just seize the chances that come to me? or just play safe?

somehow, losing someone close to you changes your whole big-picture view. on one hand, life is short, you never know what may happen, so just do what makes you happy and throw yourself into the moment.

on the other hand. be realistic and think that, no, you won't die in the next second, you have to think things through in the long term and 'do the right thing', or take the safe option.

ugh. headache and backache. going to lie down.

i need a new bag

2008-09-04T04:01:00.003+08:00

the inner zipper on my ciplak Miu Miu broke. i saw an almost-perfect-but-for-the-material bag at Stein Mart:
there was this one and black and ZEBRA! omg it was so tempting. but so not me! right?

right?

this is my dream-will-never-have-cos-too-kiamsiap-bag
nearly $500 leh!! but it's so nice...dammit Wilh, you and your Coach obsession has rubbed off!

and yeah, i just want the Cole Haan one cos it has my name on it. i ebay-ed and it was $300! for a nice deep blue one. the shape is all wrong...but it's got my name!

yeah. i am a sucker for marketing like that. got a problem? :D

LabOR Day Weekend..Selamat Hari Merdeka :)

2008-09-02T08:58:00.003+08:00

i just got back from this

good food, good company, great GREAT environment. going to sleep and waking up with the sound of waves crashing on the beach...absolutely beautiful.

still. i feel the emptiness.

dang it. it's been long enough. what's it going to take?

America - Razorlight

lazy Sunday afternoon...not! :D

2008-08-25T04:32:00.002+08:00

was vacuuming my room today and i'd finally learned how to pull up the windows (yes, after a month and a half!) but i had the fan on and windows open and it was a beautiful sunny Sunday afternoon. Percy Sledge's 'When a Man Loves a Woman' was playing on my computer, and suddenly, i just felt a rush of....

southerness!

LOL!

here is my first photoshopped photo. like it? :D

yes yes. you don't have to tell me how lucky i am to be living in a place like this. i know.

WTF??

2008-08-24T22:54:00.003+08:00

SHIT!!

so cheap!!

oh well....those in the know... ;)

to a fellow overseas Kuchingite :D

2008-08-24T22:33:00.002+08:00

hey there pretty lady.

don't know if you remember me or will you even see this post, but we met once, briefly at Java Juice, then Open A for siobee and tauhu jui, u had gubak mee! lol.

anyway. was just reading your post and it just freaked me out cos you've said exactly how i feel. had a similar experience to yours a year and a half ago..doesn't seem that long ago..i lost my mother..and then i also 'lost' someone very close to me. kinda like a double whammy :P

i was loud and 'bubbly' and 'perky' as my friends say. like you, i found great delight in the smallest of things, but nowadays watching a 4th of July fireworks display, i can't muster anything more than a 'oh, that's nice.' :P

i'm sorry if i seem presumptuous. but i just wanted you to know you are not alone.

oh. i had a dream about her last night. i can't remember any of it, but i can remember how it felt to be with her.

i still miss her everyday.

a friend in need

2008-08-13T12:33:00.005+08:00

Dear Pikachu, thank you very much for your email. i'd like to reply it in a long version but i just wanted to drop something here to let you know how much i appreciate your words of encouragement. our life sure sounds like most of us at this age now. so just know you're not alone in that :)

i guess most people who know me must think my life is grand, earning US bucks and going abroad. well guys..it's not that simple. i seem to be the odd one out most of the time, in terms of being an intern, being a guest in a family home, being WITHOUT A CAR, being an Asian..

some may think those are silly, unimportant things. but for a person like me, for whom human relations is a very important factor in her life, those things stand out to me every day. i've said it before and i'll say it again. if i wasn't making good money but i was in a job i thoroughly enjoyed and felt i was contributing to, and had an environment where i had good and dependable friends, it would be more than enough.

i went to the store and bought some pretty things to make myself feel better, as someone recommended i do. what do you think makes a more lasting impression in your memory, a new wallet or a good and long conversation with a person you feel totally at ease with?

see where i'm coming from now? :P

Well, Pikachu, my message to you kinda ended at the first paragraph. i just wanted to make a point to anyone who might happen to read this. again, i really do appreciate your email, it's so good to know that someone out there is thinking of you and cares for you. i know you're not the only one, there's all those people whom i put in my Facebook album too :)

if you really sit down and think about what this life is for, which one would you choose?

Dr Bombay!!

2008-08-05T09:43:00.002+08:00

yes i was talking to him this evening :D CoNgRaTuLaTiOnS by the way!!! i guess it's lucky i dumped you as my backup, you weren't a very good one anyway!

so he intro-ed me to this song. yes, i have shitloads else to blog, but lazy la! heheh. it gets to you man!

inside joke. only those in the know! lol

my daily essentials

2008-08-01T09:22:00.003+08:00

wah. so american hor?

but it's hard to go to the office, use a Mac, come home n switch back to normal PC. bleargh.

oh btw. the ipod is not mine! is some lady left it there. crazy eh!! the music in there is. odd. indie rock, a bit of classic rock, country (a must for evry Ipod in the South).

if you can see it, i love the song that's on the screen. go get it if you can.

mouse looks cool, but so not used to it la. have to keep cleaning it every so often due to my stupid hyperhydrosis.

sweaty palms la! yuks right.

feel so. jaded? damn aunty visit. self-esteem is taking a beating now. i want to go home and cry in my grandma's arms.

Lifesavers Wint-O-Green

2008-07-31T03:41:00.003+08:00

tastes like.

'hong yiu' (minyak cap kapak).

eeks.

and that's my food review for the day! lol

the strangeness of the Net

2008-07-30T20:17:00.001+08:00

so i'm sitting here looking up stuff, i type in 'Menorah Medical Center' and what do i get?

http://groups.google.com/group/cexqyoboyqxurbyylradaqu/web/menorah-medical-center-kansas-city-mo

go and read it. scroll down a bit to where there are huge lumps of paragraphs that just don't make any sense. for example:

"Her sister," menorah medical center kansas city mo said, menorah medical center kansas city mo was young a certain great philosopher with open arms. Her mind emptied itself of menorah medical center kansas city mo by moving a compass-needle to one of his greatest need. This then was by menorah medical center kansas city mo in no less than this. And yet I'm not trying to figure out how Stringfellow devised an hypothesis of electrical images, which became a man becomes a spectacle and, if menorah medical center kansas city mo want menorah medical center kansas city mo to pay out westward to Newfoundland. 'Spare his blushes! Beetle charms menorah medical center kansas city mo first.' Beetle stood up, "You could tell menorah medical center kansas city mo was away from menorah medical center kansas city mo. The menorah medical center kansas city mo with room stinks with sweat, dirty linen, Grover's oaths and the evil day thus for some strange communion service. "

wtf?!!!

makes for interesting reading though.

words words words...

2008-07-29T08:21:00.001+08:00

words are words are words..

believe them.

disbelieve them.

believe that they are true, for the moment, however gloriously prolonged or painfully shortened that moment might last.

allow yourself to be swept away by the current of magical, sparking fantasy that could just....just...turn into reality one day...

or.

hide forever in the dark forsaken corners of your pitiful fear.

and be safe.

nothing will happen to you then.

but then again, nothing will happen to you then.

pant...pant...

2008-07-28T19:03:00.002+08:00

i have finally found.....the holy grail....

but at 6am in the morning! gosh...

the price you pay for all that wholesome American food...

Gilad...SAVE ME!!

with friends like these.... :))))

2008-07-25T17:19:00.003+08:00

so i woke up at 4.30am to finish my damn ampullary stenosis presentation and was procrastinating yet again by checking my yahoo mail which i haven't, in AGES.

and found an email! i thought it was a forwarded one at first, Pikachu is notorious for that :D (see i got you a new nickname, Angelic-Scamp too long la :D Pikachu is the original one right?) but when i opened it, it was a REAL email!

man, i suck. i like getting stuff, but i'm always bad at reciprocating. tomato plants! argh. selfish me.

anywayyy...THANK YOU PIKACHU!!! you put a big smile on my face. made me feel less lonely :D

most of the people i know probably think "ah well, she's used to going abroad, meeting new people, living on her own.."

weHhell...i'm not as strong as you think...but i'm trying. i think i'm under a lot of stress living here, trying to make a good impression, adjusting to a new culture (yes, it is new to me, despite what you think of my angmoh-khuan-ness), being around people that i don't know at all...

i like being thought of. and yes, i do think of all of you, at one time or another during my day :)

here's the song i got with the email. at least someone's helping to update me on the music scene! :D

月光下 yue guang xia - 黄启铭 huang qi ming

owwhh chipmunk...i didn't mean you le...thanks for at least trying to send me the elva song? lol

whoa...

2008-07-25T01:35:00.004+08:00

so here i am procrastinating again. okay i am getting somewhere in my research but along the way i happened to stumble on this website:

http://www.histopathology-india.net/ValvDi2.htm

okay so basically about 2-3 months after all my shyte came down, i was having this weird heart thing, so i went to see a doctor and he diagnosed me with MVP.

no, it doesn't mean i'm a Most Valuable Player :P it stands for Mithril Valve Prolapse. the doc said it wasn't that bad.

but this is what the site has to say about it:

Floppy Mitral Valve / Mitral Valve Prolapse / Barlow's Syndrome - (Myxomatous degeneration of the mitral valve) : Image Link

One or both mitral valve leaflets are enlarged, myxomatous and floppy and they prolapse into the left atrium during systole causing midsystolic click and mitral valve insufficiency.

image taken from: http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/images/ency/fullsize/18148.jpg

The disease occurs in the age group of 20 to 40 years and may be due to developmental anomaly affecting connective tissues (as it is common in Marfan syndrome).

Clinical presentation : This is usually asymptomatic and discovered only as a midsystolic click on auscultation. It may be associated with atypical chest pain, dyspnea, fatigue or psychiatric symptoms like depression, anxiety etc.

Patients have an increased risk of infective endocarditis, congestive heart failure, arrhythmias and sudden death.

cue creepy echoey 'muahahahahaha....'

holy crap man!!!

so if i suddenly pengz...you know why la...

wah..so morbid hor!

??!!! :DDDD

2008-07-22T23:33:00.002+08:00

hohoho. i just got an SMS from the most unexpected of persons.

made me sooo SHOCKED man. not syiok k! i was gonna put shocked in the SMS but i know will kena suan again. so replaced it with 'surprised'. nyahahaha. smart lehh.

tried to find a photo but nada. how come it's so difficult to get a photo of Jacob's Vegetable crackers?

thanks anyway, lion. even if it wasn't you. which i bet it wasnt! you made my day!

and on that note..

2008-07-22T09:36:00.003+08:00

i just realised that maybe i'm being a bit unfair on myself and focusing on the black spot on the white shirt again as someone might say ;)

cause there are times when certain memories hit me...and i feel my face break out into a big grin and i hop up and down like a crazy person.

only when no one's watching though :)

my heart feels so full it might burst. and all from something that just popped up in my mind.

i am very much loved. and i am thankful for that.

in a state of zombieness

2008-07-21T06:12:00.002+08:00

okay. so that post took like. AGES to put up. that happened last tuesday i think. and i'm usually eager to have a food review up.

i feel like i'm slowly dying. so dramatic! but it's like. SLOWWWLYYY. like if your happiness was physical and you had a big big ball of it, it would feel like someone taking a penknife and slowly flicking off a small piece of it, every day.

i've lost it, i've lost my 'spark', my burst of happiness evrytime i meet someone new or experience something new. i refuse to give in to....jadeity? i don't want to be like this, it's not me.

i can't figure out what it is at all. not homesick, although i do miss home in the normal fashion. not lurvesick, although i miss Diehard a lot. a lot a lot.

must be getting aunty visit soon. dammit.

Waldo's Wings

2008-07-17T09:19:00.004+08:00

so MommyK and JK had gone to the beach for the week, and MK was at camp. Which left me and DaddyK fending for ourselves for dinner. the first day we had Subways. OldMan was freaking out cos he hates Subs but i love them! always want to order something else but always go back to my beloved Italian B.M.T!!

i guess DaddyK felt bad because the next day he brought me out to this place. now, don't even bother asking me for directions or anything! It's one of the must-try all-American food on my list, buffalo wings.
i didn't really know what to expect so i was pleasantly surprised by the interior. HEAPS of nascar, beer (Bud and Coors) and cigarette (Camel) memorabilia, surround wooden chairs and tables or booths if you'd like a more private dining experience ;) felt like a fun place.

i had a Bud Light courtesy of DaddyK before we got there, so i opted for pink lemonade instead, i'd never tried it and saw it on The Sound of Music in the hotel room in KL. what can i say? it's just like more 'flowery' Sprite.
next time i come here i'll have to go for a salad and try the malt vinegar. fyi, the hot sauce tastes almost exactly like that chilli sauce from Sabah that Paikut's sister gets.

wow. this is the first time i've mentioned him and it took me awhile to get the name.
first up: sliced potatos deep-fried and served with cheese sauce. yeah, you can guess by now this is going to be a cholestrol-inducing meal! OH MANN they were goood, i liked that some of them were a bit thicker and had more bite to it whereas some were thinner and had a great crunch. the cheese sauce was a bit thick to cling onto the chips but great and not plasticy-tasting nonetheless.

yes, i just used that word okay. so sue me!

red peppers stuffed with cream cheese and then fried in a crunchy batter...you know that's going to work. the red sauce is slightly spicy and cool, almost jammy-like.
the cool cream cheese and spicy pepper really balance out, and the batter was good, not too thick and perfectly crunchy even after it had been left out for awhile.
mozzarella sticks! with salsa sauce...now why didn't i ever think of that?? bad photo...sorry...was just too eager to get that cheesy, stretchy stick into my mouth! i like it without the sauce though, but it takes the richness off if you've had too much i guess :) and here is the MAIN meal of the day, buffalo wings! in medium hot, which i came to regret, cos after Thailand i discovered i lovee spicy food. DaddyK gave me the cheese toast on top which i only had one bite out of, cause who wants to waste stomach space on bread when there's that gorgeous spread above?
okay, so when we were finished it wasn't so gorgeous anymore. Yes, we didn't finish the chips and yes, we didn't tapao. sigh. so waste hor? but he said not to. and i am staying at his house.

i'm definitely going back!

owhmahgawrsshhh....

2008-07-17T01:41:00.002+08:00

image taken from :http://autoreview.belproject.com/media/1/20060707-2008-buick-lacrosse-super-v8-spy-photo.jpg

i DROVE today.

on the WRONG side of the road.

in an AMERICAN car!

wooww..i'm still alive. it was fun though. even though my shoulder muscles are all tense and my brain hurts from concentrating too much.

pray for me. :)

a little time..

2008-07-15T05:26:00.011+08:00

to sit down and write about my experiences so far? this is my third week on the job, it's getting interesting, thank God! i completely understand i have to just slog thru the lousy stuff before i get down to the fun bit, but it's kinda hard, as some of you will understand.

ok here's a brief rundown. i'm working as a marketing intern at a medical company we will call CMI for short. Old Man's been there for years, and since the beginning, W-S was just like this mysterious place that we all wondered about but never really thought we'd go to, much less work there!

what i've done so far:
Monday - had my first bowl of Cap'n Crunch. sweet corn-flavoured cereal, a perfect combo with milk. was evrything i'd ever imagined from reading all those Archie comics with the Cap'n Crunch adverts :D
That evening we went to this place. MommyK's food was soo good i couldn't stuff anything else down. it's been two weeks so i don't remember what she made and i couldn't take photos cos so weird right! but she got some mixed popcorn and MK had that 'custard' on the right.

i still don't really understand what custard is, i should go google it soon but it's like ice-cream and it looks damn good! the crazy kid got like 8 different toppings including unbaked cookie dough. weird but yummy!

the popcorn mix was great too, sweet caramel popcorn with salty savoury cheddar popcorn. when you get sick of one you start on the other. what a freaking good idea.

Tuesday - first day at work, and first lunch with MeowMeow. She's so pretty! i think it's her personality that enhances it, :) she's my walking dictionary for the office. She brought me to get lunch, we both had Big Daddy burgers, and oh man was it big! but damn good, the burger was juicy and of course, it being American-sized, i left four bites on the plate, and half the fries too. My feet were again killing me from the damn blisters, lucky there was a shoe store a few doors down so i popped in and got a pair of shoes :
Mootsie Tootsies, for $19. yeah i know..but my shoes were.omg.it's soo pretty and cool looking.but a killer on my feet! so i've been wearing this evry single day now. it's all good :)

Same evening - first Krispy Kreme! FYI, Krispy Kreme's home is W-S :D and i had it FRESH off the rack too, as pictured in the corner. no i didn't take those photos. i was too distracted :D so what does a warm almost-hot Krispy Kreme taste like? exactly what it is - steaming, pillowy soft dough covered in a so-sweet and almost crispy icing shell..mmmMMmm...

Wednesday - my first Twinkie! Lemony, sugary sweet soft pastry covering a cream center. i actually don't see much difference between this and the Apollo Swiss Roll we used to get at the canteen in primary school :D guess that's a Malaysian Twinkie?

In the evening DaddyK and MommyK taught me a new game and oh DAMN it's fun. ok it might seem kinda grandma-ish but if you get started i sweaar it's so addictive. or maybe it's just the aunty in me. :D welcome to Polish horseshoes!

each person has three of that thing you see hanging over the pipe rung, its 2 golf balls on either end of a rope. the aim of the game is to stand on one side of the pipe rungs and swing your golf balls to the other set of rungs, so that the rope wraps and hangs around the rungs. you can throw it straight or you can bounce it on the ground. watch a video here. (not mine!)

guess what. i won my first game! lucky eh?

Thursday - went to watch Hancock and Wall-E. going to watch Wall-E was fun for reasons i will not disclose ;) safe to say that MommyK is soooo coooooolll. In addition to the fact that she and MK love Def Leppard :D:D:D i loveedd Wall-E, it was so sweet! best scene - Wall-E and Eve dancing in space, she with her jet-propulsion and he with his...fire extinguisher. hmm. hehe. sob scene - when wall-e nearly died :S

and then....

my first 4th of July~!!! we had the traditional barbie as DaddyK likes to call it. he made this drink for me, pineapple + rum in a dug-out pineapple. so nice yea! i called it my welcome drink lol i have a retarded expression on my face but :D notice my red white and blue wardrobe?

after dinner MommyK brought me and MK to watch fireworks. we sat next to a field in chairs they had brought.
gosh. no feelings of wonder and awe anymore. is this a sign of growing up? if so, it sucks.

or maybe. i was just missing someone....

Everytime I Close My Eyes - Baby Face, Mariah Carey & Kenny G

corny eh? but i do.

anti-climax

2008-07-12T04:23:00.004+08:00

image taken from : http://www.planefunaviation.com/images/w-s_skyline2.jpg

well it could be or not, depending on your frequency of visits to this blog. sorry, dear Readers, but this blog is mainly for me to blah out my stuff, so yeah, take what you can get and all that :D

so after all that horrific disgustingness with SIA and my flight to JFK Airport, NY, i finally arrived at Charlotte Airport, NC, tired, smelly and hungry! there was a bit of confusion but i finally found MB, the Old Man's colleague and good friend in Winston-Salem. the only conversation i've had with this lady was her asking to speak to my dad and me saying hang on, for like nearly 12 years! it was great to finally meet her, she's a great lady and i can understand why the Old Man fits well with her. Let's just say she would love my family. lol.

so i'm staying with the Old Man's friend and his family, there's DaddyK, MommyK, KK, JK and MK. they're all great people, very warm and welcoming :) when i saw my room, i was just bowled over, it's even bigger than the one at home!! four poster bed, built in closet..omggg..and my bathroom is damn cool. this is all in the 'basement' which is more of a ground floor and has another living room and a games area with pool table and a bar and a jukebox and a pinball machine and a slot machine. omgomgomgomg. i think i'm more on a vacation than working mann...

ok. the dog just came into my room. gives you an idea of how things are like here. i love it!

i do want to show my dear Readers the whole place but i'm not so sure how they'll like the idea of their home being showcased on a blog. what do you think?

i feel so paiseh staying here lo. eating and evrything for free and MommyK is so nice to me. sometimes i think i kill her with my endless jabbering. oops hehe.

seriously lor. a lot to blog about. but i don't feel like blogging about anything. except about how much i miss home. i don't think the Old Man reads this blog (i hope) so i can just say it.

after two weeks of being here, i don't think this line is for me. :P it's really too bad cos there's a lot of opportunities here if i wanted it, but....i'm just not feeling it...i talked about it with MB and another great lady from work, MeowMeow and they both told me just to do what i want to do. DaddyK and MommyK too. i'm so dying to go into hospitality or tourism. it's like..working at this has made me realise more that i really want to get into that. even though it'll be crappy pay and crappy long hours, i would love it!

or maybe that's just my idealistic young self talking...few years down the road i'll be like "what was i thinking!?!?" lol.

oh well..

i miss Diehard. i miss Diehard horribly. i wish i could go two days without talking to him or hearing from him but i just cannot. i want to learn to be strong and independent so i can make our relationship better. but all that's got nothing to do with why i want to go back after the three months, and not six months as bossie (JD) is pushing for...

image taken from:http://www.quasidesigner.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/datemi.jpg

i really don't know how to tell him. Bossie I mean. and especially Old Man...

i like the company. the people are GREAT. the environment is good. i'm in the MARS building. stands for Marketing And Research & Development. cool ey? but.....
it's just not...happening.
argh. Asian mentality is telling me to take the best i can get (money-wise) but western influence is urging me to fulfill my job happiness.
what's a girl to do?

damn. the blog's called short snaps right?
byebye. :P
another time maybe.

essentials for your carry-on luggage

2008-06-28T23:24:00.004+08:00

image taken from : http://www.packinglight.net/plight/assets/assets/images/a_DelseyLuggageinCementGreat.jpg

1. toothbrush. seriously never know when you will need it. like me. now. in a hotel room without any toothbrush. and it's the Sheraton. :S

2. flip-flops. ever since Beijing, i have come to realise that, no matter how old or where you are (except maybe in places where you could get frostbite), you will always need to wear flip-flops. i now have two great big blisters on either foot because i wanted to make a good impression.

3. cellphone charger. even if you are superbly confident that your cell will last till forever. cause it won't. and you will need it.

4. extra tshirt. the lightest, thinnest one available.

5. snack bar. in case you have no food and the cheapest thing available still costs about rm30 :S

6. CREDIT CARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am so. so. so. lucky. to have one.

7. the phone number or contact of the person you know can calm you down, even in the freakiest of situations.

oh wait. you already have that in your head, don't you? :)

goodnight.

shit.

2008-06-28T19:09:00.003+08:00

shit. shit shit shit shit.

i am in a hotel room directly opposite Frankfurt Airport now. This has been one of the most harrowing days of my life.

more later.

wow.

2008-06-28T19:03:00.001+08:00

28th June, 2008. 6.30 a.m, Frankfurt time.

So here I am sitting in the United Airlines lounge at I have no idea what time in the Frankfurt airport. Another new turning point in my life. I’m beginning to think that I might already have too many of those in my life.

Actually the whole way, I was feeling rather blasé about the whole thing. I have been waiting for about half a year for this after all! It just gets to the point where you want to just get it over with. There was this great big and tall American daddy who had his Chinese

(wow I just saw a guy who looks like an oldd David Boreanez)

wife and 2 kids with him, a boy and a girl. The wife had a beautifully soft Beijing accent and I thought how wonderful it was for the kids to be growing up learning two languages at once. I particularly envied the little girl. Her dad was hugging her and playing with her and she just looked so tiny in his big frame.

By the way. I don’t think there’s a single Asian in this lounge except for the two Filipino ladies at the counter. Bleh. Get used to it, right?

Anyway, the daddy was talking to his little girl about landing in Frankfurt and he said in a singsong voice to her “we are landing in Germany”. And then it just hit me.

I am landing in Germany.

Why?

Because I’m going to the United States to meet and live and work with people that I completely do not know at all. It’s going to be a whole new culture, with barely any Asians, as compared with my first time in Perth before, and I have this gigantic fear that l will not be able to live up to the irritating reputation of being the Old Man’s daughter, whom all worship and fear.

The Old Man I mean. Not me. Obviously.

As Diehard would say. Holy $h!t!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ooh. Filipinos speaking German. The wonders of globalisation.

ohh.. speaking of Diehard. Yes. Several of the Caucasians around are quite easy on the eye. But honestly. Do I care? I just look dejectedly at their chiselled faces and remember large brown eyes on top of a gigantic but adorably sensitive nose. And the rest of the whole package.

Cue the extremely-long-drawn sigh.

Oh well. We have determined that this is definitely positively the path I should be taking. I will be strong! I will be independent! I will be…

Damn I’m tired. Talk to you when I get to W-S.

the very last time

2008-06-22T01:43:00.003+08:00

Old Man has been planning on selling my black baby #2 for quite some time now (baby #3 being my new Toshiba Satellite, no prizes for guessing #1!). on thursday morning i heard a loud *beep beep* and went down to see him behind the wheel of THIS monstrosity:
image taken from http://my.88dbmedia1.jobsdb.com/my_UploadFiles/2008/01/31/D21AE0DF-9364-4B83-9806-F0B824DD02F3.JPG

omg omg omg. the colour. i love the whole car! but the colour leaves MUCHH to be desired! sigh...got cheated yet again by the OldMan who promised he'd look into the slightly older white one. oh well, leaving Friday anyway, so will be siasoi only for another 6 days.

holy crap. that fast huh?! *panic alarm bells going off in head*

five seconds later...
so went to Garden Hill with a variety of very fun people, including Ms.Alco2 :D:D:D have a safe flight back to KL and so glad to have had the chance to meet up before you left! took the chance to drive my black baby out today, and after dropping Diehard off, had this sudden compulsion to go to my usual route.

yea ok, i admit. was feeling.........
is there no other word for it than emo?!?!?

just cos a particular song came up on my cd. even though there are no emotions anymore, i guess i just had to make REALLY sure. in the end, i drove up not even halfway and came down again.

cause i realise i didn't need it anymore.

i have a lot to look forward now, thanks to someone's unfailing patience. :) so i realise also that i don't need a lot of drama in my life, nor do i need to feel like i have to explain anything or justify my actions to people who, honestly, are not even worth a second of my time.

wow. i have come a really long way huh? but my black baby helped me a lot, she was the one who accompanied me through a lot of angst-filled, long and lonely nights. so here's to her, and may her next owner treat her well and not prematurely send her to a junk yard.

i'll treasure my last days with you, and always remember you :D:D:D

Nov 2006- June 2008

my new bayybee

2008-06-13T08:44:00.003+08:00

lol ok i had to type like that cos the other word is reserved :D but anyhooz i jus got this yest, with the help of (brainwashing ppl into liking HP but i didn't give it!!) darling Angelic-Scamp (we should really get you another nickname this is too long!) who walked with me for like 3 hours in Low Yat! thank you thank youuu for that AND the lunch at Old Town AND waiting for me while i went to get my passport which took agES :P in these days of nearly RM3/l petrol, you are a TRUEEE friend!

actually was lazy to post about anything, even this trip to KL but listening to alicia keys pouring out of the fantastic harman/kardon speakers on my lappie, i just couldn't resist! the sound is damn fantastic wey.

"it had to be you....wonderful Toshiba you...it had to be youuu~~"

edit:this is how much i love you,my satellite~ :D:D:D:D

stop.

2008-06-10T09:05:00.001+08:00

so here i go again.

and i am.

2008-06-09T00:20:00.002+08:00

lol. i know you are bad with listening out for lyrics in songs.
change most stuff to past tense though. you think i don't read it but i do. sometimes i laugh. sometimes i feel a deep sadness. i don't think i need or even want to explain anything to you. if you have those opinions about me, if that's what you need to get better, that's fine. despite what you think, i still do care about you, how could i not, after so long?

i could write about how much it hurt or all that other stuff, but i really don't want to rehash all that anymore. i think i am just really tired of this.

like the song says. gonna smile cause i deserve to.

i might have finally found someone who deserves me. and whom i deserve. que sera sera.

thank you

2008-06-08T05:41:00.003+08:00

for being there for me when i need you. even though it's not immediate, at least you are more than willing.

the feeling of having someone that you know you can count on at any time, is just.....

:)

what if

2008-06-08T04:24:00.001+08:00

what if. it happens all over again?

:(

petrol

2008-06-07T15:26:00.002+08:00

yea i bet this topic is on blogs across malaysia. have to put my 2 sen worth.

today is the first day i didn't drive all the way over 60km to Diehard's place. wow. big milestone in my life. cos everytime i press a little harder on the accelerator pedal, a little voice starts singing in my head.

78 sen....78 sen...78sen...

sigh. guess i won't be called iron foot from now on. :D

the land beside the sea

2008-06-06T23:15:00.003+08:00

so after hearing so so so much about this place, i finally went to the end of the world. lol ok not end of the world, just felt like it cos you just keep driving till you run out of road then you know you're there.

sorry, no photos. i decided to just savor everything with my eyes instead of looking thru a camera lens for once. and, if i don't take photos this time, then i'm allowing myself another chance at going there again.

it was fun. beautiful. romantic. exciting. comforting. relaxing.

thank you for making my life better :) and for giving me something i will never forget.

tomato plants

2008-06-04T21:55:00.002+08:00

and now the song comes back to haunt me.
do i ruin lives? i feel like a natural disaster :P or maybe as Ting liked to say, i put myself too much at the centre of the universe.

but doesn't everybody? :P

happy belated birthday

2008-05-19T07:33:00.002+08:00

i guess you know you have real friends when they call you up at 7 in the morning. i'm a real friend for actually picking up! lol.

i do wish you were back though. when Diehard is busy, there's no one else to look for to do nothing with :D

in the meantime, this is for you.
and this

best i can do. see, now you're in my blog, Giant :)

Peanut Butter Cookies

2008-05-19T00:46:00.002+08:00

finally THANKS TO GENIUS my internet is back up and running. see, there is a reason i give him that nickname ;)

Diehard was AutoCad-ing away and i was bored so i suddenly decided to make these cookies i saw in one of my mother's many-but-unused recipe books. i think it's called cooking class for beginners, i can't remember.

i've been craving soft, Subway-esque cookies for quite a while now, so i thought these just might do the trick since the recipe doesn't call for any flour. if i recall correctly, ingredients listing was:

1 cup of peanut butter (chunky or creamy is up to you, i prefer chunky for the texture)
1 cup of packed brown sugar
1 'large' egg (grade A i guess?)
3/4 cup choc chips.

easy shit eh? but guess who looked at her small jar of skippy and got stingy :D so i cut the recipe down to mixing 1/4 cup peanut butter, 1/4 cup butter a bit less than 1/2 cup brown sugar* and half a beaten egg in a bowl. the butter was added in hopes of obtaining that soft, chewy cookie texture.

well, what happened was that the whole thing was a bowl of liquidy mess that just simply could not be shaped into balls of cookie dough..so i had no choice but to add some plain flour to the mix..i did this bit by bit so that the mixture was just thick enough to be balled.

don't have a baking tray so had to use a small cake tin that had sides low enough for me to keep an eye on my cookies while they were in the oven (preheated to 180C by the way). about one really heaped teaspoon for one cookie which is dropped onto the greased cake tin. i finished that, then realised i didn't put in my 'choc chips' (choc bars that were chopped up into small bits), so had to pick up the dough in the bowl again and mix the 'chips' in.

*i took this from the heaps of small sachets of brown sugar that comes with Chek Hup coffee, you have GOT to try it, it is the best 2-in-1 in the worrldd, creamy nutty rich instant coffee..mm...ipoh people really know their stuff :D

12 minutes later, this was the result. 9 cookies in total. no wire rack so had to settle for this raised plastic thing.

yeah, flat and misshappened eh? at least they tasted pretty ok, but not the texture that i wanted, probably because of the flour. the lines are made by pressing a fork crosswise into the cookies before going in the oven.

there was still a bit left so i made this one for Diehard. it got broken when i tried to flip it over though. but he said he would fix it. :D

oh well

2008-05-06T21:47:00.000+08:00

i guess you're not calling back. ah well. best movies weekend is over i guess.

maybe. maybe. maybe. i might need a break.

who invented all the stupid rules of the damned game anyway?!

lazy. lazy. lazy

2008-05-01T19:01:00.002+08:00

so many things to post.

am becoming a big tub of lard. that's the biggest (pun intended) and most important bit of news.

main reason tho. net is shitty and uploading only 5 photos at a time with so little editing space is getting really annoying.

dinnertime. welcome the Grand Matriarch back from Lundu. :) i missed you.

sweet and sour fish! in 2 plates! cos the fish is so huge! good job Old Man.

praying for pain.

things i am supposed to post

2008-04-23T03:31:00.003+08:00

padungan and the pretty chamber pots
satok malay stall food
bing! night
big apple donuts
starbucks coffee tasting (VVIP)
Diehard's salad
making Old Man's birthday cheesecake
Old Man's back-from-travelling goodies

damn. i am a lazy blogger. for the millionth time. this is why i don't put up ads. it's torture enough coming here and finding..nothing!

and admittedly i am a lazy friend too. MissAlco, i am VERY VERY sorry. i know i should have gone out with you like ALL week, cause you are really a very fun(-ny) person to be around and i admit it, i was lazy. lazy as HELL. which is why i will try not to make the same mistake with MissAlco2, or as she titles herself, Nicole. or was it Paris?

am having second thoughts about being Amy Winehouse. that winged eyeliner look is something i will never perfect.

oh, since we're on apologies, here's one for Sakuraku, whose dvds i STILL have not managed to burn. and my Bestest Bestie, whom i have not called until today. should i be handing one out to Genius too? the only one i have been in almost-regular contact with. oh. no need lah.

i am a bad bad friend. please forgive. :P

confound it

2008-04-03T22:49:00.002+08:00

i need some alco. to get me gone. strange i don't seem to be able to let it go so easily either. not because of any stupid residue feelings. just..

i can't take the corpses out from under my bed. i cannot bring myself to burn the scraps of paper that doesn't matter to me anymore.

damn weight in the chest is back. i need to sleep but it won't come.

not again.

my heart will go ooOOOoooNnnNNN~~~

2008-04-03T15:32:00.002+08:00

the weirdest ever thing just happened.

a hot but cloudy thursday afternoon. i am sitting at my computer with my windows open and humming of the fan at my back. suddenly an ice-cream truck song starts blaring from nowhere, with its shrill music-box-like qualities breaking the stillness of the afternoon. i strain my ears to jolt my brain into remembering why the song is so familiar.

and then a motorcycle with an ice-cream cooler strapped to its side goes whizzing past on the road below. as i watch it vanish into the distance, i suddenly realise what the choice of song to lure children out of their homes to purchase a cold, creamy confectionary and break the afternoon heat is.

my heart will go on, overplayed-t0-death, bricks-dropped-on-the-stereo-playing-the-song-
on-Letterman-Show, theme song from the Titanic.

whyy lahh choose that song!?

My Breadmaking Adventure

2008-04-02T16:50:00.004+08:00

ok ok. fine. i'm cheating again. but only because...well..ok you've got me. i don't really have a valid excuse but! i made bread! there, i knew i'd get your attention. ready?

ok this isn't bread but i like sunsets. and i am SURE i took a much better photo than Diehard did! boo for him that he doesn't have a blog to put up his version and prove me wrong ;). i have no idea where we were coming from. but i like sitting in his car. well, the white one anyway :D

(side note: i had such a bloody hard time finding the manual for this machine (Princess Homemaker) cause darling dearest Tassie took it out one time when she was here and promptly left it wherever she happened to be sitting. yes, it's a family trait, one which i also happened to inherit so i shouldn't be complaining really :P the online site is useless, it only provides for the newer model, so if you've lost yours, gimme a buzz and i'll fill you in.)

Old Man said he wanted to eat bread. so i said i'd make him some cause i remembered seeing some wholewheat/grain/i don't remember organic flour that my mommy dearest must have bought AGESSSS ago but never got around to making(yes, i love her so but she is like that :S). so i took out the butter before we went off to dinner and basically just threw everything in the Princess breadmaker.

So i just basically threw everything in,plain and bread flour, butter, sugar, egg, milk...can't remember what else. Diehard called and i told him i was making bread and it would be ready by 1 a.m. since it takes 3 hours to bake. guess who immediately came rushing over!

he was going on about how his mom said if you look at the dough baking, the yeast wouldn't rise. ok so we went to buy some burgers instead :D yum yum yum!!

so 3 hours later, here it was. a beautiful brown loaf of bread. a bit too brown for my liking....we had a bit of trouble turning it out of the pan and there was a hole at the bottom from the kneading element but otherwise it looked pretty..edible?

someone couldn't wait for me to finish my photo-taking so we could tuck in. after 2 burgers too! don't worry, i still think you're hot ;)

with the ever-present golden churn butter. the bread was pretty dense and the crust was quite thick. i wondered at that. check out the cool bread knife the Old Man got from the States way back. kinda difficult to use tho :P but i'm a sucker for wooden stuff, blame it on the parents.

a conversation with the Old Man half an hour after baking had started.

Me: i've already put all the stuff in the machine, it looks like it's going well.

Old Man: what?! you started baking now!?

Me: yeeaahhh..... (complete with quizzical expression)

Old Man: so what time's it going to be done?

Me:...er...1 a.m. i guess, why? don't worry, i'll put it in the container then you can have it for breakfast tomorrow (smiling the naive smile of a daughter who thinks she has finally done something that her father can be grateful to her for...little does she know...)

Old Man: but the whole point of the breadmaker is that you can have fresh bread early in the morning when you want to eat it! not at 1a.m!!! if i want to eat it tomorrow then it won't be fresh bread anymore!

Me:..(looking incredulous)...soo....i'm supposed to just dump all the ingredients in and let it sit till like, 4 in the morning?!

Old Man: YESS!!!!

Me: EWWWWWWWWWWWwwwwww......

ok ok. i was grossed out as hell because i didn't think letting all that stuff, PLUS egg, sit in the breadmaker for more than an hour was exactly fantastic for the health. but then the next night, he was relating the whole thing again to MakKo (and oh yeah, he called me ~~sukuci~~ a name which i shall not jot down here for fear of offending younger readers).

she looked at me with an i-can't-believe-you-did-that type expression and exclaimed that she had never given me a recipe which called for egg, and that if she had, it was a bun recipe. i defended my (then-seeming innocence) and said i'd followed the instructions she'd given me before, to a t. really.

of course, when i got home, i saw that the post-it i'd written the recipe on had one for White Bread Recipe, as opposed to the Bread Dough Recipe above it, hidden from view by a magnet, and eggless.

damn fridge magnets.

salvation!

2008-04-01T06:32:00.001+08:00

i think i have finally found the answer to my blogging problems!

Google Docs!!

will test drive the next post and let you know :D